‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ movie won’t feature all of Jamie Dornan

Bad news for the more hard-core fans of “Fifty Shades of Grey”: the upcoming film adaptation of E.L. James’ sexy novel will have one really big omission.

In an interview with the Guardian, actor Jamie Dornan, who plays the film’s kinky protagonist Christian Grey, revealed that he won’t be revealing too much in the movie. “There were contracts in place that said that viewers wouldn’t be seeing my, um ...,” Dornan tells interviewer Nigel Farndale, who prompts him with “Todger?”

“Yeah, my todger,” Dornan replies. “Todger,” in British slang, means penis.

This might prove to be a disappointment to the book’s many fans — the explicit novel has sold a reported 100-million copies, despite its lowbrow reputation. The film, which opens in February, may well become a huge hit. Dornan shrugs off the “intellectual snobbery” regarding the novel: “[W]hatever you might think of the prose style, 100 million is a lot of people. Are the literary critics saying those 100-million people aren’t very bright?”

After Farndale seems to confirm that this is the case, Dornan responds with “OK. Fair enough.”

Dornan’s refusal to go “the full monty” might be a relief to the more prudish fans of the book (which, in all likelihood, do not exist), but not everyone is impressed with his modesty. At the blog Jezebel, a perplexed Isha Aran muses, “There you have it. A todger-less Fifty Shades. What IS this movie even?”